Taste Life....

"Passion, it lies in all of us, sleeping... waiting... and though unwanted... unbidden... it will stir... open its jaws and howl. It speaks to us... guides us... passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love... the clarity of hatred... and the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion maybe we'd know some kind of peace... but we would be hollow... Empty rooms shuttered and dank. Without passion we'd be truly dead.” Joss Whedon

Passion is my ruler, long has been and long will be....and for such i am greatful. My heart leads fast and furious, my head sometimes lingers behind but not so far behind that i'm reckless or careless, i may get my heart broken from time to time, but my heart mends well and the joy i've known in love has always been worth the risks. It is that empty room, that shuttered dank that i fear, i fear it more than any heartbreak. I know how to heal from the wounds, i can trace each scar upon my heart and with atleast a faint smile and recount to you how it came to be, there are sweet old memories behind each one and i choose the joy in the memory not the pain that left the scar to move forward with.

Some may look at me and call me silly, i still feel that patter of my heart from time to time, the beautiful rush of hope, of potential......i fly high on the beauty of maybe. And yes, that sets me up for a great fall...so call me humpty dumpty. Let me fly....god how i love to fly - if i fall, my pieces will reconnect again i assure you, i will not be dashed so completely i cannot repair, but i need to soar every now and again, just to remember that i can touch the sky. And maybe...someday.....i'll stay up there.

I know you want to protect me, and i want you to, ground me where i need ground me and slow me where i need slowing, but share with me the joy too please, i beg you. When i called today i did so because i am passion, i am excitement, i am a little girl all a flutter with something i haven't known in a very long time.....so please, understand just a little and play with me in my big field of daisys.....i'm dancing, dance with me too....i want you to feel this joy i'm feeling. If i fall down and cry tomorrow i won't make you patch me up if that's what you want, i'll let you say i told you so, if that's what you need, just please, dance with me a little, today. Oh because i so want to dance. Does it make sense? Can you understand?

i hope someday you do understand

because its the cornerstone of who i am

as honestly and truthfully as i can put it, and maybe someday you'll get that......

i'm not confused, i'm not flighty, i'm not risky....i'm just...passion, open and true and free.